Posts on the Gender Debate

Below you will find links and descriptions to my blog posts related to the gender debate. Does God want men and women to lead together in the family and church?

In this poem, a woman argues with her husband about allowing her to go to war with him. The man and woman represent all men and women in Christendom, and the battle is a spiritual one. My husband, Philip, created the beautiful artwork for this poem using Midjourney, AI.

The Argument Before Battle Poem

Through the fight of two children, this poem explores how scripture and power have been used to keep women from having authority. It also delves into a possible future where women do the same thing back to men, and the consequences of such behavior.

Working with Dad's Tools

This is a poem that I wrote while thinking through these men and women’s issues. It uses 1 Corinthians 13 as a basis for asking the hard questions: what’s the point of insisting one way or the other if it doesn’t lead to loving men and women better?

If You Do Not Love

This blog uses an analogy of children playing hide and seek to think through leaders’ responsibilities in Christian relationships today. Are leaders there to protect the weaker and smaller children? How can they best do that?

A Game of Hide and Seek

This next blog is a short story rewrite of Genesis 3 exploring the different options of what Adam and Eve might have done. This story explores the idea that Adam should’ve protected Eve from the serpent and why perhaps that wouldn’t have solved the problem in the long run. My husband created the picture for this blog post using A.I. Midjourney.

What Didn't Happen in Genesis 3

This blog post attempts to answer the question, “Why did God make man first?” I have tried to keep my reasoning based in scripture.

Why Did God Make Man First

This poem is inspired off Genesis 2:10-14, which names Eden’s four rivers before the making of Eve. The description of these Rivers seems to be indicating something about God and perhaps something about Christ. It also seems to be hinting at the way God made man and women differently.

God, Our Father

This blog post examines a section in one of Dr. Dobson’s books where he points out some unique strengths of men and women. I dissect his findings and relate how he describes men and women to the executive and legislative branches of government. I also relate this to the Genesis account.

Dr. Dobson and Authority

This blog takes a look at Ephesians 5 where Paul asks wives to submit to their husbands because husbands are the head of the wife. What does head mean? What does this mean for men and women? And how might we still use Paul’s instructions today?

Seed Planter

This blog post is a rewrite of Ephesians 5:21-33. It explores what it means for the man to be the head of his wife, and how that might correlate with women.

Ephesians 5 Rewrite

This post is a conglomeration of verses that apply to all Christians, men and women alike. In this post, I focus on how these verses do not exclude women from all Christ offers to his followers. If anyone is going to argue that God does not intend women to be part of leading God’s family here and now, they would need to exclude women from the authority given to both men and women in these verses.

Encouragement to Women

The next several blogs are a series of arguments and rebuttals. This is the plain reading argument, which asks, “Why can’t we take Paul’s writing about women in 1 Timothy 2:12 at face value? Why do we have to make Paul complicated to understand him?” 1 Timothy 2:12 is that verse where Paul says he doesn’t allow a woman to teach or have authority over a man. In this blog, I give four counterarguments.

The Plain Reading Argument

The Argument from Tradition goes something like so: “For thousands of years, churches have followed a men-only model of church leadership. Many prominent and foundational church fathers, missionaries, leaders, theologians, and saints have followed men-only models of church leadership. Do we think they all got it wrong?” In this blog post, I attempt to answer this argument.

The Argument from Tradition

The Slippery Slope Argument is one that suggests that we may end up deviating from all moral values if we say that Paul’s commands about women are merely a cultural thing for people in those days. In this blog post, I attempt to answer this argument.

The Slippery Slope Argument

The Hidden Wisdom Argument warns against hasty decision-making regarding putting women in leadership. It suggests that we don’t really understand what Paul meant about women, and thus, we shouldn’t proceed with allowing women into leadership. In this blog post, I attempt to explain how Paul talked about his own wisdom.

The Hidden-Wisdom Argument

This post is about the Unrealistic Argument that states that having women serve as leaders alongside men is idealistic and thus, unrealistic. There are too many problems and issues concerning the nature of men and women. In this post, I give three counterarguments.

The Unrealistic Argument

This next post addresses the Succumbing-to-the-Curse Argument, which accuses women of trying to dominate men just like the curse foretold. This argument uses women’s motives to discredit women’s arguments.

The Curse Argument

This post attempts to answer the Keeping-The-Peace Argument for not allowing women into church leadership. If allowing women to lead may cause a church to split, why do it? Shouldn’t we be keeping the peace?

The Church Split Argument

This argument proposes that having women leaders is not bad, but just not the best. Why would we want to settle for anything less than the best that God has in store for us?

The Good, But Not Best Argument

This argument fears that what has happened in the work world will happen in the church. Women have been allowed participation in all fields of work even ones where they are not as capable of service as men. Will this happen in the church too?

The Job-Stealers Argument

This last argument addresses the convictions that might lead women to give up their rights on this issue.

The Goes-Against-Conscience Argument

This flowchart and accompanying explanation examine the places in scripture where wives are asked to submit. It examines the “why” behind each instance and explores if the application is still necessary today.

Wives, Submit!

This next link is a link to summaries of Cynthia Westfall’s book Paul and Gender: Reclaiming the Apostle’s Vision for Men and Women in Christ. In this post, I give an overview of Cynthia Westfall’s book and provide further links to her nine-chapter summaries. She focuses on how traditional interpretations of Paul fail to work with Paul's theology of salvation, authority, or power, nor do they align with the cultural and social contexts of that time. She offers alternative and what I thought were more logical ways of understanding Paul.

Paul and Gender Book Summaries

This blog post discusses the difficulties with understanding metaphors in the Bible and how that might apply to Paul’s use of the word “head.”

Metaphor Problems

In this blog post, I rewrite 1 Corinthians chapters one through four as if Paul were addressing the Corinthians church about the gender struggle debate. This portion of scripture seems to be addressing a fight in the Corinthian church about who was the best leader to follow: Paul or Apollos. The structure of Paul’s argument lends itself to being used for the gender debate too.

1 Corinthians 1-4 Rewrite

This is a rewrite of 1 Samuel 25:14-31, which is the story of Abigail going out to meet David and make peace for her husband’s foolishness. This story puts angry men into David’s shoes regarding the way women mistreat them.

Abigail's Apology to Men

This is another rewrite of 1 Samuel 25:14-31, but this time I’ve placed women in David’s shoes. Abigail in this rewrite addresses the griefs that women might have against men dominating and insisting on ruling in the home and church.

Abigail's Apology to Women

This blog post is a C.S. Lewis Screwtape Letter rewrite as if one devil were teaching an underling how to use the exclusivity of men-only leadership to undermine the heavenly authority and power given to women who follow Christ.

Screwtape Letter Spin-Off

This blog post explores whether or not women need women to show them how to be godly women. Was Jesus enough? If so, is the experience of men and women really so different?

Do Women Need a Woman Savior?

This post discusses the way in which we define men and women to the exclusion of each other and how that locks us in cages.

Defining Men and Women

This post examines what we mean when people say, “Don’t leave it to the women.” Is this a way of admonishing men to step up and do their duty? Does this apply to leadership in the home and church?

Don't Leave it to the Women

This blog post examines an admonishment that I’ve heard given to men. “Be the kind of husband that your wife would willingly submit to.” Does this admonishment set up men for success?

Be the Kind of Man


Abby's Alley is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.