The Argument: “It is my deepest conviction that the Bible teaches that leadership in the home and church ought to be a man’s responsibility. I cannot, in all good conscience, allow women to be in leadership when I believe it goes against God’s Word. We may not like it, but what we like doesn’t really matter. What matters is that we are obeying God.”
Concession 1: If someone is afraid that they’re breaking God’s laws and thus sinning by having women in leadership, it would be against the ways of Christ to despise, shame, or coerce such a person into accepting women as their leaders. It is better to willingly give up our freedoms for the sake of the weaker brother than to force men into what they believe is a sin. By doing this, we follow Christ’s example of sacrifice while losing none of our Heavenly treasures.
Concession 2: If this is indeed someone’s conviction, so be it. But if they are unwilling to examine scripture with an openness to other possibilities, then it’s doubtful whether obedience to God is the motivation behind this conviction. It may be fear, hurt, anger, or other such sensitivities. Regardless, we still have an opportunity to extend love to those in turmoil by leaving space for the Holy Spirit to change their hearts as only the Holy Spirit can. After all, exercising our freedoms at the expense of someone else’s feelings is not in line with Christ’s compassion and love, even if that other person has not treated our feelings with the same respect. To avenge is human; to forgive and extend grace is Christ.
Concession 3: This argument sounds based on obedience to scripture without the healthy acknowledgment, processing, and surrender of emotions or desires. Perhaps this person has been told by religious teachers and parents that their emotions and desires are wrong and thus must be stifled, stuffed, or conquered by willpower. Believing that God wants our obedience and not our hearts, leads to slavery, not a relationship with Christ. Such a person who has been taught that their desires do not matter needs compassion, not counterarguments.
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Amen