The Lions of Dandy were an unwelcome bunch With their jaggedy teeth and their yellow-maned faces. They lived where they could in various places. In the shadows of trees, weeds grew such as Bindweed and thistle, purslane and clover, crabgrass, oxalis, pigweed, and spurges. But the Lions of Dandy were not like those scourges Though many pejoratives they had the world over. In truth, the Lions had all sorts of powers To hydrate and heal skin and cancer prevention. Some even said they'd fix hypertension. But the Stevens expelled them for fear they'd devour Their lily-white lawn or growing bed's flowers. No recommendation could change their opinion Of the Lions of Dandy they found in dominion Until George the Pig of Guinea's stomach went sour. Too much lettuce and celery had he That his stomach had no room for Timothy Grass, hay, or pellets with drops of vitamin C Dispensed by son Lee every day after three. Weaker and weaker George grew by the day His long hair fell out. His weight could not pull. He lay in the wood chips, lethargic and dull, Unable to climb his ramp to play. Fearing George's impending demise They turned to the web to discover the cause Of George's decline. Could it be because He was lonely in his cage without other guys? They let him run free in the yard with their bunnies To cheer up the guy from his looming depression, But George only sniffed them and ruined his digestion By eating Yew Pine, which is deadly to tummies. After that old George wouldn't get up. He lay in his refuse, twitching and ill With his eyes open wide. It gave them the chills. But what could they do to liven him up? Then a lady from church by name of Kris Maynard, Handed the Stevens a column from paper About Lions of Dandy's gifts to all eaters To heal and to nourish better than taters. They're better than spinach and microgreens Better than vitamins A, B and C's. Better than kale, arugula, peas. Most nutritional greens ever to be! The Stevens had hope when this they read. They must find those lions to give to poor George. But in their own yard, they'd nothing to forge. The Lions of Dandy had needfully fled. So under the maples in late Grandma's garden, Which hadn't been tended since her convalescence, They found a few lions that came in acquiescence To be George the Pig of Guinea's life's solution. The Lions gave up their roots and their jaggedy teeth. They lay down their lifeblood for Georgie to eat. They'd never reseed where they had been free For to George the Pig their cure they bequeathed. But do not pity those Lions of Dandy For they let George live. He grew stronger each day Until he could frolic, squeak, run, and play. And now the Stevens view those lions as candy. They welcome them hospitably into their lot, Letting them grow in their garden or grass As if they belonged there on purpose en masse A precious and valuable plant to be sought.
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A very clever poem and very useful information. I inherited a Pig of Guinea when my young adult grand daughter moved out. His name is Houdini. He’s over five now. Very reclusive, but seems to be very content that way. I think I will scare some lions of Dandy and add them to his weekly diet. They were a little out of season right now, maybe I can find some at the regional park. Houdini likes Timothy hay, his usual commercial, pellet, medley, carrots, apples, celery. When he hears the refrigerator open, he grinds his teeth against the rungs of his cage, sort of like prisoners do with their tin plates and water cups. He’s a lazy squeaker. Perhaps we can arrange a play day for Houdini and the Steven’s Pig of Guinea, George.
I should’ve tried it on our George maybe?