How to Stay Sane While Picking Up After Your Kids
a step-by-step repeated procedure
Step 1: Lose your mind
You may think this funny. How can you stay sane by losing your mind? Good question. I don’t mean to lose your mind in a way that prompts bitterness or hopelessness.
I mean let go of your current mindset. Let go of your methods for keeping yourself sane, secure, safe, and happy. Until now, you relied upon a certain standard of orderliness to feel good. Lose that mindset. Lose the belief that your methods of orderliness are going to satisfy you. Try saying:
“I don’t have to meet my standards of order to be okay.”
“I don’t have to have all the toys picked up off the floor to feel at peace.”
“I don’t have to have things in their place to get on with life.”
“My order doesn’t have to be enforced to know that I’m doing things well.”
Step 2: Believe it
It’s not enough to say the above statements. You’ve got to believe them. If you still think having your home according to your order would make you happy, then you can’t move on to the next step.
You actually have to stop believing any lies about what would make you happy: “If only the children wouldn’t leave their toys in the hallway, then I’d be okay. They can leave them in the living room but not the hallway.” Or “If only the other adult in this house would pick up his things, I’d be okay. I can handle kids leaving out their stuff, but not the adults.”
Yeah right.
People who say these sorts of statements are merely deceiving themselves. If-only statements lead to more if-only statements, which lead to even more if-only statements. Like clicking on YouTube videos.
Try this instead:
“God made me to be perfectly satisfied with His order, and His order obviously isn’t for me to have a perfectly organized house right now.“
You will know if you really believe it because you’ll feel a physical relief of tension in your body.
Step 3: Assess what you’re doing
I think the name of this step says it all. Assess what you’re doing. Are you always picking up your daughter’s shoes because she comes in, sits on the couch, and then chucks her shoes on the living room floor? Are you always cleaning the toilet because no one else knows how to do it? Are you washing your teen’s dishes because he knows you will just do it for him anyway.
Step 4: Do the next thing
Ask God what’s your next assignment. Ask: “God, how would you have me bring about your order in this space?”
This means developing new systems, chore charts, places to keep things, bins, boxes, baskets, rhythms, rules, and consequences. Develop them with your spouse, write them down, date them, post them, explain then to the kids, and try it out. This is your home; rule it!
When the new system breaks down as systems always do, repeat steps 1-4.
*These steps could also keep you sane while trying to diet, maintaining a difficult relationship, or making meals for complainers.
To read more like this, click the link below.
Love this!!